You walk into your office on a Monday morning and there is a note from your boss telling you to come into her office. A nervous feeling comes over you and. . . yep, sure enough your worst dreams came true and you just got laid off. You feel embarrassed, rejected, scared and frankly, mad, as you felt that you were a good employee. So, you Mr./Ms. Reader, how would you handle this situation? Would you:

A: Crawl into a hole with a gallon of ice cream and isolate yourself from the world?

B: Consider walking back into the office and knock out your boss and all of the annoying co-workers?

C: Request the time and support of your closest friends and family to let you vent and gain their opinions on the matter?

Hmm. . . . I'm sure you may know the correct answer here; I hope (and it has nothing to do with Rocky Road). Each and every human on the planet, given they have lived long enough, has experienced some sort of emotional and/or physical hardship. Whether it be job loss, death of a loved one, divorce, illness, and on and on. This type of life experience is virtually unavoidable by and large. However, it is the reaction of one's self that will make all the difference in how he/she moves forward and copes. And a major factor in doing so is to have a strong and positive support network.

A social support network is made up of friends, family and peers. A social support network is different from a support group, which is typically a structured meeting run by a mental health professional. Although both can play an important role in times of stress, a social support network is something you often develop when you're not under stress. It provides the comfort of knowing that your friends are there for you if you need them.

Most often, meetings with your support system are informal. Coffee with a friend, a walk on the Monon with a sibling, lunch out with a close co-worker, or cuddling with your pet are all good examples. In difficult situations, the challenge for most is that they find it hard to make the first move to ask for the support. I assure you that way more often than not it is best to reach out as they will likely need you in the future for themselves.

The benefits of reaching out and receiving support are numerous, but the main components include:

• Belongingness
• Self-Worth
• Security

Although family and friends are the usual support system it isn't a bad idea to widen your reach. For example:

• Become a regular at your favorite workout class. I have seen people become good friends simply by the familiarity and sharing interests (and making fun of me while I teach the class) 😄
• Volunteer for a cause that is important to you and you will likely meet like-minded people.
• Go online and reconnect with long distance buddies on Facebook.
• Join a group such as running, knitting, book club, etc.

It is important to remember that to maintain a healthy support system that YOU need to do your part in the relationship as well:

• Keep in touch when you are not down and out: I had a friend that would call me ONLY when she and her boyfriend were fighting. When they were "getting along" I wouldn't hear a peep.
• Listen: Try not to yammer on and on about the bad situation, and hear their perspective. My husband is great at explaining how I can see something in a different light and usually he is right.
• Don't go way overboard: While reaching out is important, don't bombard your network with constant phone calls, texts, etc. Respect and value their time as well.
• Say thank you: acknowledge their time and how important they are to you. And be there for them in time of need as well.
• Lastly watch out for negative supporters: Or as I call them "energy suckers". Avoid people that are negative and critical as it will only create more stress instead of reducing it.

In summary, we all need others and others will need us to live a healthy lifestyle. It is actually a strength, not a weakness to reach out for shoulder to lean on.